I really thought I was going to get in here sooner to report on my doctor's appointment last Friday, because after the appointment I felt pretty good about things. For example, according to the x-ray I only have mild knee arthritis (and it would not be causing this kind of pain), and my overall leg strength is good I'm told. And the best part - the doctor believes physical therapy will resolve this present issue.
It all seemed like such good news that I didn't complain when the doctor said he didn't want to give me a cortisone shot. I hadn't even asked for one yet when he told me this. I'm not sure I had a choice in the matter, but with all the good news I wasn't too troubled about him not offering it. But when the pain flared up again later that evening, and by that time I knew a PT consultation was going to be a week and a half away, I started to feel frustrated and resentful that all he suggested for pain relief was Ibuprofen or Aleve. They don't even take the edge off when the pain is really bad. I've mostly stopped taking anything altogether, it's that unhelpful.
I'm not a big medicine taker, but I've been frustrated several times now (after two surgeries last year and now this) when I've been in serious pain and all that is offered is less than effective doses of prescription and OTC pain medicine. I just don't understand how some people who are looking for a "fix" can seemingly easily get their hands on pain medicine through illicit means, and someone who is honest, and experiencing real and terrible pain, can't get the medicine that might help them endure more easily. It's maddening to me. It's depressing and discouraging.
Insert deep sigh of exasperation here.
Having gotten that off my chest, I guess I'm coping okay. Discouraged and depressed at times, but okay I guess. Do I have a choice?
The diagnosis I was given by the doctor is patellofemoral pain syndrome. It's actually pretty common I now understand and PT should help resolve it. Having gone online to find advice on how to cope with the pain and help it heal (since I'm left to my own devices until PT can begin), I'm now thinking there is another possible issue that may be causing my pain. The good news is PT should still help if my issue is something different from what the doctor diagnosed, or if I have more than one thing going on (which is entirely possible, and maybe probable).
Edited later to add: At my first PT consultation I was also diagnosed with pez anserine bursitis. I know, it's a funny name, and if you look it up and see what it means (and why it got its name) you'll think it's even funnier. Before PT, as I was looking through videos for exercises to help what the doctor told me I was dealing with, I found this condition and thought it better described my pain than the doctor's diagnosis did. The good news is PT should help it, and will hopefully help me not get this aggravating condition again, or have the tools to get better if it does flare up again.
So I'm prescribed 6 weeks of PT (to begin 4 weeks into my present struggle), and if that doesn't resolve the pain, there will be next steps. While I've grown frustrated with the medical establishment (for reasons beyond not getting adequate pain relief), I do encourage anyone who's like me - someone who puts off getting something like this checked out - to get it checked out. The thing that hurts might just be fixable. I've dealt with this knee for over a year now, and after I've read how these kinds of issues can end up creating chronic problems, I do wish I hadn't put off seeking help for so long. Therapy is going to be a bit of a drag, but I'm hanging onto hope that soon I'll be headed in a direction that will provide more lasting relief than I can get on my own.
Pain aside, I had some nice distractions in the days following my doctor's appointment. Last weekend held a birthday celebration for middle son (which saw me limping, but very happy to have everyone together), and Monday I actually felt good enough to drive a bit of a distance to visit a friend. I'm so glad I did. It was a beautiful day to sit out on her deck and take in the view of the woods behind her house. The scenery and the laughter shared over anything and everything was very good medicine. Then over the rest of this week, the pain has been off and on, sometimes causing me to sit with my legs up, interspersed with periods of activity like cooking and laundry mostly. This whole experience has been up and down, both physically and emotionally.
At the risk of sounding downright whiney (if I haven't already), this waiting time is very hard. I just want to feel all better already. I want to do some yard work or clean windows, something outside when the days are beautiful. And we've had so many beautiful days this late winter. I want to take long walks - both for the physical exercise, and for the emotional benefit walking would be. And getting a full night's sleep sounds gloriously indulgent, yet impossible. I'm trying to find ways to manage this waiting time so that discouragement is held at bay.
One of the things I've been humoring myself with is what some call zen-doodling. Others call it meditative or slow drawing. I used a gridded drawing like these to make a cover for a birthday card for middle son:
And I'm a little obsessed with this fun wave pattern:
Yesterday, I took another stroll around the yard and I see more evidence of spring:
Glad to have seen the hole early. Hub has found moles pretty easy to get rid of once we discover their presence. We only had one or two last year and he was able to catch it (or them) with a contraption a neighbor loaned us. It may be time to buy one of these for ourselves. It looks wretched (and it is for the poor mole), but it does work.
That's all for me this week, I think. I don't plan to go on again about my knee until I'm either improving, or have to face a different plan. I hope you're doing well - physically, mentally, spiritually. Wherever you are, I hope you stay safe, warm and dry in this unpredictable, changing late winter weather!
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Sorry for the endless knee trouble. It does drag, doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteIt does seem to be, Liz. Interestingly, even since writing this post, my knee seems to be feeling some better. Mornings are the worst, but I'm hopefully when I get to PT this week I will have made some progress already.
DeleteHow awful for you it does seem like one thing after another. I had to wait for 2 years before I had physio for my neck and shoulder pain and they just sent me exercises by post! I'n the end I watched YouTube videos and got more help from there, I hope you have a better experience and they can make things better for you. I went through a period of Zen drawing it's quite addictive. Take care. Xx
ReplyDeleteOh Linda, it's been a year, for sure! I have great hopes I'll receive decent attention at PT. I just hope my therapist is open to the thought that I may have more than one thing going on so the exercises are most helpful.
DeleteSorry you are going through this. Chronic pain wears away the soul, changes one's outlook and enjoyment of life. I'd get a 2nd opinion on the injection.
ReplyDeleteMay, you put that so well. It's hard to explain how "wearing" having something hurt continually is. This past year I have become much more sympathetic toward and understanding of people who suffer chronic pain. In fact, sometimes I watch people I know have chronic pain and I marvel at how well they manage.
DeleteThe Zen drawings are a good idea. I like to sketch designs that look like ribbons and then color them in with my pencils. Oddly relaxing. I hope your knee problems go away and you feel so much better very soon.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Barbara. :)
DeleteOh, I am so sorry you are going through all this. It is indeed so very frustrating when you have to wait. I can only imagine how hard it is with that pain. Prayers for you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Billie Jo!
DeleteOh dear me. I am so sorry to hear this. I do hope it gets better soon with PT. I understand your grievances about the medical system. It seems it takes forever to see someone if you have a real issue. I have had 2 such experiences in the last 11 and a half months. I got so tired of whining that I would often just say I was fine when I wasn't, but then again mine wasn't knee pain which is terrible. So you can whine all you want.
ReplyDeleteIt's so easy to feel more fine than one actually is when sitting in an exam room. There must be some sort of name for this "I'm suddenly not hurting syndrome".
DeleteSorry to have been gone so long and not visiting. Looks like I missed a few things. Sorry to hear about your knee pain. I, too, suffer with knee pain off and on in both knees. The first knee I had surgically fixed, but it took a year to recover and I don’t ever want to take a year-step backwards again. My knee problems are minor so I have chosen to go back to my knee exercises and stretching that I learned in PT. It DOES make a difference for me, but it takes time to realize an improvement. I am now at the stage where if I skip 3 or 4 days in a row, I can feel the problems in my knee return. In the meantime try heat or cold to help with the symptoms - I found cold helped reduce the swelling and made my knees more flexible. But with arthritis, maybe heat would be best. Anyway, when PT discharged me several years ago she said - you need to do these exercises for "the rest of your life.” Yikes!! And, of course, I stopped at some point. Now I understand. I need to keep my legs strong and flexible and can only achieve that if I regularly exercise. Anyway, hope you find something in my own experience that is helpful to you.
ReplyDeleteAnd thank you for sharing your experience. Elaine. You've given good advice - If the exercises I'm given in PT resolve my issue(s) I need to keep up the work. I know it will be a great temptation, and I probably will forget once the knee heals, but maybe I'll at least be able to nip a problem in the bud before it becomes as awful as it did this time. I have been icing and resting the knee mostly at this point, and doing some exercises I've found online that don't stress the pained knee. I think I'm seeing some improvements, but I hope the therapist can more thoroughly see what I need to do and give me the tools to get all better.
DeleteYou really have gone through a lot of health issues. I'm very glad for you that you don't need surgery. I can relate to the whine! But I do wish others would note that when you are in a long spell of hard health things-it's very hard to 'look up'!
ReplyDeleteI feel a bit run through the medical ringer at the moment, Debra. I think this my payback for avoiding doctors for years. I was telling a friend the other day I don't want to go for any well check-ups, out of fear they will find something else! Of course, I need to overcome that thought, but it gets on my last nerve to think about making appointments for even well check ups right now.
DeletePrayingfor you my friend...
DeleteI'm so sorry your knee is still hurting and that you didn't get any immediate satisfaction from the doctor. Hopefully the PT will do what's needed although I expect likely it might take a little while to feel results.
ReplyDeleteOh Mary Anne... my PT appointment was today and I can't tell you how happy I am with my therapist and how thorough she was. She more correctly diagnosed my problem, and has started me on exercises. I expect it could take a bit more time before I'm taking any long walks, but feeling better already from the exercises I found online to do before therapy started, I have great hope I'll be feeling even better within the week. I sure feel better about things in general, that's for sure.
DeleteSo sorry about your knee, Becki, and it (and you) will be on my prayer list. I have had similar knee flare-ups a couple of different times, with the same diagnosis (arthritis). Fortunately, physical therapy has worked for me. Learning the stretches and exercises and doing them faithfully during and between visits (and after PT ended) did the trick. It did not happen overnight -- in fact it took several months -- but eventually the pain subsided. Hoping the same for you. Keep us posted.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your encouragement and prayers, Bob. Turns out I have an inflamed bursa, and it's going to take working on my leg muscles to get them all working better together. I think you're right, that I'll probably have to continue exercises long after PT (or at least employ them if this flares up again), but I'm feeling so much better tonight after a great PT appointment today - both over the therapist I got, and over the prognosis for turning this around.
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